Tuesday, August 7, 2012

A Birthday to Remember

Every year we get one of these cards in the mail for our little son Kael, right around the time of his birthday.

It may seem a bit silly that I haven't turned "off" the mail for him, but honestly this is the only piece he gets.  And it's just once a year.

It used to be so hard to get this card, a sign that for me, the hardest grieving day of the year was coming (his birthday).  It was so painful to get a birthday card for my child that had died when he wasn't here to open it.

Now it's just one of those things I look forward to seeing.  It's one tangible way to acknowledge his very existence, his mark on this world.  And with the silly giraffe on the side, the pile of presents, the words "special gift" below... it brings me joy.  That's what Kael was and is, a special gift.  The funny thing was he had a little stuffed giraffe that we put into his crib during the time he was alive, a Beanie Baby named Jumpshot.  And the presents?  His life is worth celebrating!

This little piece of mail speaks so much to my heart, even if it is "just" a Toys R Us card.