Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Love

Last night I had a dream that Aria was going to be taken away from us to live with a temporary foster family. Never mind that she is legally adopted or any of the other logic of reality... this dream, I think, had a purpose that I needed to hear.

In this dream, I remember being so incredibly sad... sad that she would have to get adjusted to a new family again, that she would have to mourn all over again. I was also deeply sad to be losing her. I was going to miss her something terrible, this little girl that impacted my life more than I had realized.

And when I awoke, what came to my mind was gratitude. I was grateful it was only a dream. I was grateful that because of the deep sorrow I felt in my dream (and the residue that remained when I woke up), I was shown how much I have bonded with Aria. I hadn't realized... I didn't know... But now I do.

From my depths, love is growing in big ways over this little one. As difficult as the journey has been, as questions have gnawed in my mind and put doubts in my soul if God was sure that He got this one right, as each day goes into the next and growth is hard to measure, an amazing love from the Architect of all of this has pierced the walls that guard my heart. Really, I had no chance to keep that love out, no matter the protection I place around my heart. That's kind of the way the Maker of heaven and earth works when He lives inside of you.

Thank you Lord for revealing this to my heart and soul in such a kind and gentle way.

So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.
1 Corinthians 13:13

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